Galicia later, alligators!

Yes, so as you may be aware, I, Jordan Patrick Sanders, will be leaving for Galicia, Spain on September 15th. The journey to obtaining my acceptance in the program and the current preparation for my visa has been a testament to my patience. With most things in life, you apply for something and find out quickly whether you're appointed to do the thing or not. I waited for four agonizing months to finally get placed in the region of Galicia, to then wait for another month-and-a-half to learn my school and city. Officially, I will be living in the city of Ourense and helping out a primary (elementary) school in the small village of Cortegada. The population of Cortegada is 1100, so that gives you an idea of how small it actually is. Here's the website for the school if you're interested in checking it out: http://www.edu.xunta.es/centros/ceipoteronovas/

Fortunately, I'm now in correspondence with the P.E. teacher at CEIP Otero Novas, Manuel, and he has offered to help me find a place to live, and also informed me that he and 3 other teachers live in Ourense and will graciously offer me a ride to work. This really takes a load off of my mind since I just now have most of my visa situation figured out (fingers crossed that there are no problems with my state background check *not saying they will find anything on me, but I just hope there isn't any unforeseeable issue I haven't considered*) and haven't had a chance to even consider where I'm going to live. Manuel says normal rent for a flat with roommates is 150 euros a month, which will leave me with a lot of extra cash for travelling and experiencing the nightlife. I can't imagine other expenses such as a cell phone plan, utilities, or groceries will add up to much per month, so I'm excited. I also know from reading blogs that many auxiliars teach private English lessons for extra cash, which is probably what I'll end up doing once I'm comfortable.

Ourense has a population of about 110,000, which is a big step up from the suburban cities I'm accustomed to living in. I've never lived in a real city where shops, restaurants, bars, and the like are within walking distance of my place, so experiencing city life in a different country is going to be EXTREMELY EXCITING (note the caps lock as a representation of my vigorous intensity in expressing this). Ourense is noted for its beautiful architecture, Roman spas, and rich scenery. The buildings are made of old brick and the roofs appear to be topped with clay shingles. Here are some examples:

(This is a street perspective of some street in Ourense)


(Here's a bird's-eye view of the tops of a bunch of buildings)


I don't know much more about it yet, so I'll report back with more information soon! This is real, guys, I'm going to be living in the beautiful country of Spain for 9 months! As an extremely country southern person would say... YEEEEHHAAWWW!

P.S. Once I finally get all of my visa information together, I will be driving down to Houston, TX with two of my besties (Chris and Isaac) to turn everything in. We will then be spending a few days hanging out in Austin, TX with our friend Scruff. Expect some interesting future blog posts.

Stage Three: Bargaining. WHY IS THIS PROGRAM TAKING SO LONG TO ADMIT ME? I promise to be nice to everyone for all eternity!

As many people may or may not be aware, I have applied to a program in Spain which would allow me to live there for 8 months as a teaching assistant to an English teacher. This is a really exciting opportunity for me to discover a beautiful culture, speak and improve my Spanish, and interact with students who want to learn.

In order to brush up on my Spanish, I've been practicing with flash cards, speaking Spanish with my roommmate, listening to radio stations from Spain, constantly translating in my head, and practicing pronunciation and proper phonetic speaking. It's been a blast so far!

Speaking Spanish is more fun than I realized while I was in college. It used to seem like learning it was a chore, but all of that has changed. I'm just glad I dedicated my time to learning it while I was in school instead of brushing it off. (Thank you, studious past self!)

I submitted my application a little over 2 weeks ago and received my "inscrita" number (or my place in line for consideration). Over 4,000 applicants were accepted last year so I have a good place in line (my number is 1826), but I'm starting to get worried. The next step in the process is being upgraded to "admitida," which means the regional representative has looked over my application and at least acknowledges it exists and meets requirements. It doesn't necessarily mean I have a placement, but it means I've done everything correctly in the application process.

I've been anxiously awaiting for my status to change, but to no avail. It's really starting to make me nervous, even though this is probably normal (maybe, perhaps, I hope?!). I would do anything to be in this program. ANNNYYTTHHIINNGGG. HEAR MY PLEA, SPANISH GOVERNMENT!

In other news, I'm starting this local program called "Read to Succeed" that helps adults with low reading levels/adult ESL students learn to read. Monday night was my second training session, and I'm excited to get an adult learner to start helping. I stated that my preference is to work with an ESL adult, so hopefully that's who I'll be paired with.

Not only will this program help me get some invaluable teaching experience, but the joy of helping someone learn to read is a reward in itself. Nothing is more important in my eyes than education and reading, so the fact that an adult who can barely read is willingly volunteering to learn is something I admire and respect.

I'm a bit nervous because I'm not sure what to expect exactly, but I have a feeling the goals/lessons I need to prepare will become clear once I meet my learner.


In more frustrating and stressful news, I've been working close to 40 hours the past couple of weeks and the stress of my job is starting to get to me. I've had little to no free time or alone time in a week-and-a-half and it's starting to overwhelm me. I've barely practiced Spanish in the past 6 days, I haven't been sleeping because of stress nightmares, and I'm starting to get sick.

I wanted more hours in order to start saving for Spain, but I can't handle being at Publix for 38 hours of my week. It slowly creeps into my consciousness and blocks out all of the more important parts of my life. My reflection and personal time is very essential to maintain a proper functioning brain and body. I am going to make a drastic change post-haste.

In more personally frustrating news, a huge electric bill has prompted my roommates and I to turn our heat off, which is slowly becoming a terrible decision.

My house is so cold...

*AUDIENCE RESPONSE* HOW COLD IS IT?

My house is so cold that it bothers me enough to make comments about it in my otherwise focused blog that has nothing to do with my home's temperature. ZING!

In closing, waiting to hear back from about Spain is slowly driving me insane, but I'll get through it. Everyone I've talked to that has done this program or visited/lived in Spain completely loves the country. I'm just ready for some new experiences!

Stage Two: Anger. All of my relish is gone. I NEED STIMULATION.

It's official. Everyone around me is back in school and the veil of post-grad reverie is slowly coming to an end. I'm honestly surprised it lasted this long. For the past month, I've basically been drinking, sitting around, and obliviously letting time slip away from me. It was odd because while I was enjoying being out of school, I never realized that those around me were just enjoying their winter break. The thought simply didn't occur to me.

Now, I'm slowly roundhouse kicking this post-grad "WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY LIFE FOREVER?!" perspective, and adopting a more serious and practical approach. What do I actually want?

I asked myself today, "What do I think is the most important thing on this Earth?"
ANSWER: Education. I could talk endlessly about how important education is to understanding yourself, the world, society, ideas, beliefs, and to becoming a decent human being.

It's funny because I started my college career with the intention of becoming a high school English teacher. After my 11th grade English teacher Mrs. Tate showed me how wonderful teachers can be, how much they care, and fueled my passion for reading/writing, I decided it's what I wanted to do. Heck, I even won English 4 student of the year at my high school (this has nothing to do with anything I'm saying; I just wanted to brag for a second.)

But through a series of insecure thoughts, doubts, unfortunate life circumstances, lack of commitment, and simple dumb-assery, I gave up my aspiration. Rather than face the challenge, I quivered and cowered in fear because I wasn't mature enough to handle the challenge. I also did a great job at making up excuses as to why I didn't want to teach. Oh man, the best one was "I just like English way too much. I feel like it'd be more personally fulfilling for me that it would the students." DUMB. I think I'm ready for all of the intrinsic/extrinsic pleasure, BS, and grueling intensity that comes with being a teacher.

SELF ANALYSIS AND PERSPECTIVE EVALUATION: So, what I'm basically saying to myself is that I want to become a teacher. My current mentality with that as a potential goal really:
A). Uplifts my spirits
B). Taps into a reservoir of intellectual stimulation and drive
C). Seems normal and brings me joyful feelings

This of course would require me to go back to school, but at least this time around I would have a clear goal in mind that I want to achieve.

I believe this is why finding a job has been so difficult for me. I feel like just getting a regular ole job is a waste of my creativity, intellect, and passion. The simple thought of putting my mental effort into being a teacher gives me this unique energy I haven't felt in 3-4 years. What have I been doing?

I guess I'm what they refer to as "a late bloomer."

Since I have this whole "5 Stages of Grief" shtick going on, I might as well relate all of this to anger in some way. To be frank, I am angry it took me this long to come around and realize what's important. I will deal with my anger somehow (Punch dance out of my rage most likely.)

Hm. Well, tell me what you think, internet. TELL ME NOW.

Stage one: Denial. Just kidding, I'm not in denial. Or am I? Uhhhh. Weird.

Confessional poetry has always been a big creative release for me, so a blog detailing my personal experiences and feelings isn't a remote endeavor for me. Also, I'm bad at introductions.

Hello, welcome to the soul-searching uncertainty that is my life after graduating college. This is my first post of many so sit back, relax, and enjoy the mental joy ride into the mind of a well-meaning lad whose principled honesty will hopefully make for an interesting read.

Before I graduated, I had friends tell me that everything feels "weird" after graduating. "Weird?" I thought. How could graduating feel weird? It's such a vague word that could be applied to a number of feelings that are ineffable or incommunicable, but that's exactly how life after college feels--weird. I'm currently stuck between this bizarre realm of an immediate sense of urgency to find a job and a lax limbo where simply hanging out around my house and reading or watching Netflix feels comfortable. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to rush into the next stage or really relish in my new found freedom.

Questions that bug my subconscious and conscious mind:

When is the appropriate time to stop relishing?
Am I relishing enough?
Should I allocate equal time between relishing and finding a job?
Is it possible to relish while looking for a job?
Why is relish nowhere near as good as actual pickles?
Do people even like relish?

I feel like a smoker who has gone cold turkey.

I've been in school since I was 6 and now, within the blink of a 182, I'm asking myself, "What's My Age Again?" What does a normal 24-year-old do? Am I a normal 24-year-old? Do I want to be a normal 24-year-old?

I honestly didn't realize how hard it is to find a lucrative and intellectually stimulating job until I started searching. I think that may be a personal flaw of mine. Hoping that there is some perfect job out there that challenges my intellect in a way that is rewarding and isn't completely soul draining. This is such an odd transitional phase I'm currently experiencing. On one hand, I can't get a job writing anything because all of those jobs require experience that I cannot ascertain without first being hired. BUT! I have only searched for jobs in the Nashville area. Expanding my area of search to other states may open up other opportunities, but I haven't reached that point of consideration yet. I really, really want to live in Nashville, but I digress.

Right now, I'm basically as confused and lost as I figured I be. I'm trying really hard and combing through job listing sites like a school nurse looking for lice, but I still can't help but feel I'm rushing things. For example, I recently had a job interview with a company that turned out to be a pyramid scheme. We all know the useless knife pyramid scheme company Vector. You know, the guys who make you buy their knives at a cheaper price to then sell to strangers in awkward sales meetings (or so I've heard.) Well, this company whose name shall remain anonymous... just kidding, they're called Titan Elements, Inc.

DISCLAIMER: Do not get involved with this exploitative, greed driven group of monkey suit wearing sociopaths. They make outrageous promises and only look to use and abuse workers for their personal gain until they finally quit.

The job itself was paraded very ambiguously on Craigslist as an advertising job. Sounds like it could be legitimate, right? WRONG. The job itself consists of standing in a Sam's Club at a sample booth while egregiously trying to sell unintelligent "consumers" doofy shit they do not need. The guy who interviewed me not only:
A.) Talked and looked like a complete sociopath
B.) Gave off the prostitute raping, never leaves his waiter a tip vibe
C.) Was a complete dick

But, he was only those things. Needless to say, I passed on the job.

I'm a writer. It's what I do and that's that. But, there's this weird (there's that word again) sense of outside pressure I need to relinquish before I can really focus on this screenplay I'm writing. Writing this blog post has certainly been enlightening and fun. I think that's what I need right now; good ole-fashioned fun. I've spent the last 2-and-a-half years not having any fun, so I deserve a nice hiatus into debauchery and comfort zone shattering experiences. I need to simply stop worrying so much about finding a job that is everything I could possibly ever want out of a job. It's simply not feasible right now.

SELF-ADVICE: Calm down and just take the days as they come without any "I totally have my shit together" pretenses. It's unbecoming, anyways.

Adjusting to life after college takes more time than I figured. So, without further personal analysis and self-questioning, I'll leave you with a suggestion:

Watch the movie "Frances Ha" by Noah Baumbach and Greta Gerwig, especially if you're in my current position in life. It's very relatable.

I feel better already. Thanks internet audience.